what if every blade of grass was a penis?
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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