My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
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