so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
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