It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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