At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
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hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
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My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
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