u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
