he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
