Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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