Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
