Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
