that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Randomize
