so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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