This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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