im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Randomize
