We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
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