forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
