I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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