Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Randomize