Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
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