Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
