...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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