Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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