Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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