I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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