Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
