quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
