Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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