WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
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