Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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