his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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