What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
