is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Randomize
