i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
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