I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Randomize
