My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Randomize