I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
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I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
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She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
He did a backflip because drugs
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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