Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize