Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
this hospital has no fireball
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Randomize
