I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Randomize
