There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
