I'm really into asian looking animals
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
