I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
two words...techno handjob
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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