why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
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I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
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sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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