I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
