She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
