The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I just want nice things and good sex
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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