wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
