You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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