haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Randomize
