well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
my penis made a compromise with my morals
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize