NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
